Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Vampiress Review: The Insatiable

The Gist:  A shy guy down on his luck decides to spend his free time trying to domesticate a female vampire.

Clarification: Shawn Patrick Flanery plays "Harry Balbo".  Harry one night after promising to help a homeless guy on the street ends up witnessing the guy being the midnight snack for a vampire.  The thing is, the vampire was pretty hot.  Since he can't get her out of his mind he comes up with a plan to trap her which he does (in a giant rabbit cage in the basement of the apartment building he lives in).  From there he tries to tame her, trying to convince her to eat animals instead of humans and develops feelings for her.

Female Vampire Factor: This Movie gets a Vampire Beauty rating of 2 out of 5.  While the vamp prostitute outfit that she's stuck in is pretty sexy, a good majority of this movie is a pathetic looser of a guy talking to a hot girl through bars.

Vampiress Cast

Tatiana is you standard run of the mill vampire hotty who spends her nights feeding off of homeless people she finds on the street.  Played by Charlotte Ayanna, when she gets caught in a trap set by a lonely and pretty pathetic guy she begins to remember what it's like to be human and even falls for the guy.  The best gift she gave him (outside of eternal life) is the ability to stand up for himself , something he's never had his entire life.

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