Vampiress XXX Review: "From Lust Till Dawn"

 

The Gist:  Once she's brought back from the dead a vampiress sends her minions after the offspring of those who originally destroyed her. 

Female Vampire Factor: The movie is told from the point of view of a woman named Monica Dawn (Christina Black) who is being interviewed by a guy.

She somehow knows every detail of everything that happened well before her own involvement so she gives the story from the beginning starting with how a group of vampire hunters stopped a sexy vampire Queen named Cassandra (Shay Sights) by setting her on fire and hiding her ashes. 

Monica then explains that 20 years later a woman named Angelique found the ashes (Stevie).  We then get a sex scene featuring Angelique seducing a man in a dirty room before having sex and biting him. 

She then spills his blood over Cassandra's ashes bringing her back from the dead.

Cassandra then orders her minions to seek out the ancestors of those who destroyed her so that she may drink their blood. 

This leads to a couple sex scenes that end with collecting the blood of women.  The first being a threesome with two vampire guys and a girl and the second being a lesbian scene with Angelique seducing a nun.  The final ancestor is the narrator of the story Monica who Cassandra confronts herself at what seems to be an S&M club (this is also the point in which Cassandra's costume which has been holding on for dear life to keep her large fake breasts in check just gives up).

This leads to an orgy scene between Monica, Cassandra and a male vampire.  Right when Sonya goes to bite Monica she pushes Cassandra away, fangs out herself and proceeds to make short work of the vampires eventually killing all of them. 

Back in present day the guy interviewing Monica tells her that he does not believe a word of her story.  Monica basically says she doesn't care then forces herself on him. 

Just as it looks like she's going to bite him the guy wakes up in a sweat in his bed.  He goes into his bathroom to throw some water on his face when he realizes he's been bitten and his reflection disappears. 

Final Opinion: Considering the amount of garbage that was being passed as vampire films in the adult genre in the early 2000's which was still the era of bad Buffy the Vampire Slayer parodys this is very good. I was pleasantly surprised that the Monica Character gets the most vamp screen time considering she turns so late in the film but she flashes her fangs A LOT.

On top of that I love Cassandra's double fanged look and that costume is pretty amazing.

I give this a Vampire Beauty Rating of 5 out of 5.  Highly recommended. 

Vampiress Review: "Bram Stokers Dracula's Curse"

 

The Gist:  When a rogue vampire Countess and her brood break a truce between humans and vampires,  It's up to a disbanded group of vampire hunters along with the fiance of a woman kidnapped by the countess to stop them.

Female Vampire Factor: The main villain of the film is Countess Bathorly (Christina Rosenberg)

The film follows a similar premise as Kindred: The Embraced were vampires are divided into mafia style clans.  The Countess leads a clan that consists of all females.

She is pretty obviously inspired by Countess Elizabeth Bathory as her background story is exactly the same.   When it came to established vampire names, they changed a few letters I guess to establish them as their own. 

While all the other clans agreed to the truce Bathorly was nowhere to be found and presumed dead thus never agreed.  Once all the other clans became weak from not drinking human blood she sets out on a plan to send her vampiresses to hunt pure blood descendants of "Dracoolia's" original brides as drinking their blood would give them the strength to then destroy or force all the rest of the vampires to worship her.  

Most other female vamps in the film are just background T&A but there are A LOT of them.  You do get reveals that Dracoolia's brides looked exactly like the descendants that are being hunted.

Who themselves are revealed to have been turned by the films final battle including the sister of one of the vampire hunters and the missing girlfriend.

Finally the love interest of vampire hunter Jacob Van Helsing also turns out to be a vampire. The hunter in reality wants to be turned but she refuses as she loves him too much to curse him.

 She is forced to change her mind when he has fatal injuries and she turns him to save his life.

 

Final Opinion:  The film is probably 85% hot female vampires though they really don't do too much vampiric other than the above kidnapping and turning scenes and one scene where the boyfriend of the kidnapped girl is trained on how to kill a vampire by being confronted with a sexy vampire to see if he could do it. A scene which in itself is odd as it's addressed in the film that not all vampires are bad and they don't kill the ones who aren't and she does nothing to instigate being used for target practice. I guess we are to assume she is one of Bathorly's girls.

Otherwise they're just eye candy in the background of scenes which includes a small bit of vampire lesbianism and a lot of fight scenes.

I give this a Vampire Beauty Rating of 5 out of 5.  It's pretty corny and the ending twist is best described as super convenient as it completely nullifies the rest of the movie but it is definitely watchable if women with fangs is your thing. 

Vampiress Review: "Vampires vs The Bronx"

The Gist: It's up to a group of young kids to save the Bronx when they are the only ones to realize that the new real estate developers in town are really a cover for a brood of vampires looking to take over the neighborhood.  

Female Vampire Factor:  Our one and only femme vamp is Vivian (Sarah Gadon)

Vivian spends the first part of the film as an unassuming sweet innocent overly friendly white suburban stereotype who is repeatedly shown as a fish out of water in the urban lower class burrow she's moved into, often being met with paranoia from those who encounter her that she's just there to call the police on everyone. 

 

All the while the vampire related happenings are pointing at a blond man as the main vampire who the kids of the neighborhood identify and try to convince everyone exists.  Obviously no one believes them.

 

It isn't until about one hour in that its finally revealed that the main real estate agent is just a familiar for the vampires and the blonde vampire we thought was the main vampire was just a henchman.  Everything is cleared up when the boys steal a key from the vampires layer.  Vivian then goes around the neighborhood looking for them and after realizing that the owner of the local convenience store has figured her out (he see's that she doesn't show in the stores security camera) she fangs out and drains him. 

 The boys along with one of the local girls who's the only one who believes them eventually end up at the convenience store and realize the vampires got to the owner.  When the local gang bangers and the vampires go after them they escape but run into Vivian on the way.  Not knowing she's one of them they take her back home with them to safety.

When they get back to one of the boys apartments they start to realize Vivian is acting weird.  She's making small talk with his mom in an obvious effort to be invited in. As if she can't come in unless specificity invited.  

When their holy water starts to bubble they realize she's a vampire and out her to the kids mom.  Vivian then fangs outs and admits that she isn't just any vampire, she is the commanding vampire for an expedition to take over the Bronx. She demands her key but gets doused with holy water instead. 

From this point on till she is finally staked during the final fight scene between Vivians vampires and the residents of the Bronx, sweet Vivian is long gone and she spends the rest of the movie pretty much dressed like Selene from Underworld while fanging out and killing or attempting to kill anyone on screen with her that isn't another vampire.

 

 

Final Opinion: This is Netflix's newest original film and I have to say I have no complaints here and give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 5 out of 5.  A movie where the main antagonist is an attractive female vampire who spends the last half of the film fanging out and biting people pretty consistently is as good as a PG horror comedy is going to get.  Not to mention the swerve of an unassuming background character for the majority of the film all of a sudden being not only the main baddy but a primarily vicious one at that was very well done.  Netflix does a very good job of giving some sex appeal to its horror comedy villains even when the main protagonists are children much like in their "Babysitter" franchise.  This definitely has high re-watchability. 

Vampiress Review: "Lillith's Awakening"

The Gist: A girl living in a small town trapped in an unhappy life has visions at night of a female vampire.

Female Vampire Factor: Depending on how you see it is how many vampires are in this film 
as the concept is basically the film trying to make you question Lucy's sanity.  Is she becoming a vampire or is she just losing her grip on reality? (basically an artsy version of the Nicolas Cage film Vampires Kiss)
As far as what the viewer sees you have the vampire that she see's in her thoughts and dreams.

This vampire is seen killing the pushy guy Lucy was cheating on her husband with and eventually bites Lucy herself.  From there Lucy begins to act as if she is turning which eventually ends with her attempting to bite a random woman before her husband stops her.  The film ends with her turning her bloodlust to him. 

Final Opinion:  This is a fantastic film that I can't say enough good things about.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.  The thing keeping if from a straight 5 is just the fact that the vampirism itself is few and far between in the film.  It's the way the film teases you regarding when it's going to happen that's the true selling point which makes it that much better when it finally happens.  I highly recommend this one.

Vampiress Review: "Dracula Prisoner of Frankenstein"

The Gist: Dr. Frankenstein moves into Dracula's castle and resurrects his dead body in order to use the vampire to do his bidding.

Clarification: I don't know much about the background of the making of this movie but by watching it it's very obvious that this film as well as Dracula's Daughter was made at the same time as they have pretty much the same cast and same setting though this film would be a lot tamer than Dracula's Daughter which was released two months after this one.  

It's not a very strong film story wise and can be summed up pretty effortlessly.  Basically Dr, Frankenstein resurrects Dracula,  Dracula attacks a few people, The Dr. regrets resurrecting Dracula and destroys him, the end.  Unlike many of Jess Franco's films this one can't be described what so ever as erotic horror though.  There is no nudity or eroticism whatsoever in this one.  Obviously if you saw my review for Dracula's Daughter he more then made up for it with that one. 

Selling Point: Another opportunity to see Britt Nichols with fangs.

Female Vampire Factor: As mentioned above it's pretty much the same cast as Dracula's Daughter so this would be the first of two films were Nichols would be playing a sexy vampiress but this film is not even in the same league as the other one in the "Sexy" category.  Here she just kind of appears randomly to take victims or just hiss at the screen where as the other one she's a full blown lesbian vampire sex pot.

Also in the film Dracula takes a crazy woman named Maria (Paca Gabaldón) and turns her.  She really only gets one scene as a vampire before she's destroyed in the films finale.  Her role for most of the film before that is to make random orgasm like noises in a room whenever she's on screen.

This is definitely a skipable film all around.   At the end of the day all this film does is make me want to watch Dracula's Daughter again which is a great erotic horror film as this makes me appreciate it so much more (plus you get to see the women in this film naked in that one).  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5. 

Vampiress XXX Review: "Muffy the Vampire Layer (1992)"

The Gist:  A California Cheerleader along with her friends raid a spooky castle looking for vampires.

Clarification: This is a film from the end of the golden age of adult cinema.  Back during a time when it was super generic and cheesy, full of big hair and terrible double entendres that always lead to random out of the blue sex.  Outside of the storyline you get 5 sex scenes.  3 standard guy on girl, 1 three way between two guys and a girl and one lesbian scene.

Selling Point:  The master vampire in this film is female.

Female Vampire Factor:  This is one of those "The payoff comes at the end" films.  Muffy's friends get picked off one by one by their A.D.D. which results in them forgetting why they're at the castle in the first place and having sex with anyone they meet up with which just leaves her by herself. That's when the master vampire arrives (Tawny)

This leads to a lesbian sex scene where the master vampire gets the best of Muffy.  Muffy (PJ Sparxx) then wakes up in her bed.  Was it a dream?  Apparently not as she wakes up with the vampires cloak on.

While the end of the movie was a nice payoff it really isn't much of a vampire film as much as it is an awkward comedic parody of the 1992 Buffy film that doesn't really pull that off well either.  For that I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.

Vampiress Review: "The Sexy Adventures of Van Helsing"

Gist: The distant relative of the original vampire hunting Abraham Van Helsing goes to the tomb of the daughter of Count Dracula with the intent of destroying her but ends up hypnotized into working for her instead.

Clarification:  At this point Seduction Cinema actually had a decent budget and had begun making the corny movie parodies we all know and love that air on Cinemax and Showtime after dark so this film comes off as no more than a slightly tweaked remake of one of their original films, 1998's "Vampire's Seduction".  The plot is EXACTLY the same with the main difference being the actors and instead of the protagonist being a nerdy guy named Wally Van Helsing, it is a nerdy girl named Wilameena Van Helsing.

Selling Point:  It is definitely a better quality film than it's predecessor and much easier on the eyes.

Female Vampire Factor: Despite the DVD cover which depicts film star Erika Smith with a stake and Dracula cape there is only one female vampire in the film and it's not her.

Darian Caine (Countess Dracula)

 If you've seen (or read my review) on Vampire's Seduction you already know the deal.  Take one hot actress, throw her in a pair of boots, some lingerie, a Dracula cloak then give her a bad Hungarian accent. Then just have her whine about needing lesbians the whole time and finish it off with her dying through a lame food gag and there you have it.  This film gets a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  I REALLY would love to see Darian become a vamp in a more serious (and I don't count the train wreck that was "Lust for Dracula") film because it's hard to really get into this one with all the fart gags.

The Sexy Halloween Costume gallery 2012 edition

It's that time of year again.  A vamp lovers favorite holiday, Halloween.  As Lindsay Lohan's character in the film "Mean Girls" stated, it's the one time a year a girl can go out dressed like a slut without anyone saying anything.  While the sexy vampire isn't the most prevalent costume you'll see, it is definitely the easiest one to pull off for those who waited till the last second to figure out what they were wearing to the Halloween party.  Also thanks to main characters in series like Twilight, The Vampire Diaries and True Blood all being turned, the vampire costume should be in high demand for the next few years to come.  In honor of the Holiday I've gathered some examples of the hottest vampiress costume styles you might find as you frequent your Halloween parties this year.  They've been divided into catagories for convenience.

Catagory #1 - The out the box costume.
This category consists of the costumes you find off the store shelves that range from your full length Victorian era gown to your glorified street walker uniform in the color scheme of the classic Dracula cloak. 

Catagory #2 - The Slutty Vampire.

This is basically just when a girl finds the skimpiest thing in her closet and throws some fangs on with it. 

 Category #3 - The Slutty Dracula
Same concept as the "Slutty Vampire" but she throws on a Dracula cloak to let you know that she's not just any random slutty vampire, she's the QUEEN slutty vampire.

Category #4 - Cosplay
From Vampirella and Bloodrayne to Akasha some decide to dress up as their favorite vamp from TV, film and other genre's

 There you have it.  Now you're ready to go vamp hunting tonight.  This is the one day a year they should be relatively easy to find.  Good Luck, have fun and be safe!