Sunday, May 15, 2016

Vampiress Review: Summer of Blood

The Gist: The most annoying person on the planets love life is turned around for the better when he is turned into a vampire.

Clarification: Not the most realistic film in the world but Onur Tukel as "Erik" is downright obnoxious.  Not "Indy film writer just doesn't know how to make people seem human" obnoxious but strategically obnoxious.  Kind of like any character played by Sasha Baron Cohen.  He's stupid, annoying and completely unaware of how socially awkward he is. The unrealistic part of the film is just the fact that he's getting dates in order to show how socially awkward he is as someone like this in real life wouldn't probably be able to have a women give him the time of day let alone the number of dates he gets throughout this film for him to screw up (not to mention the film begins with his girlfriend proposing to him which he of course being awkward turns down).

It's not much of a vampire film as that portion of the film doesn't happen till much later and as mentioned in the gist the vampirism here is just used to heighten his abilities in bed.  It is shown that he has the power to hypnotize people but for some reason he never uses it on any of the women he's targeting and pretty much has to beg for their attention.

Selling Point/Female Vampire Factor: So any female Erik bites ends up turning which is a positive but they're only seen is various sex scenes with him and have no role outside of the PG-13 simulated sex.
The only one of his "victims" (they aren't really victims as they really enjoy both the sex and getting bitten which seems to have an ecstasy effect on them) is the co worker that he masturbates to at work Penelape (Dakota Goldhor).  He ends up biting her on his wedding night resulting in her following him back to his honeymoon sweet for more.
The film is an awkward at best comedy that starts out extremely annoying.  Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  A better vampire sexual comedy would be the film Vamp U

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