Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Vampiress Review: "Night Shade"

The Gist: A widower in mourning is shocked to discover that his wife who he believed died of a mysterious illness is alive and well and working at a strip club.

Clarification:  Granted, most Fred Olen Ray vampire films have generally the same premise (the vampire strip club) but this one has the luxury of two distinctions.  It's the one with the most female vampires, and is also the most frustrating to watch.  It's like watching those infomercials where they try to sell you some pointless contraption by making a simple task seem way more difficult than it is.  In this case the difficult task is standard conversation in which apparently everyone in this film is bi-polar.  I mean it's a softcore porn that even makes the act of having sex seem like a really really frustrating thing to do.  In one of the scenes the main character "Scott" might as well said "how dare you come into my house in a sexy dress and start sucking that, get out, I'm offended".  Again...this is supposed to be a softcore porn.  I guess no one told "Scott" that's what is SUPPOSED to happen in these things. 

Selling Point:  A lot of female vampire stripping time killer scenes.

Female Vampire Factor:  As I said in the clarification this has the most female vamps out of any Fred Olen Ray vampire film he's done as there is only one female in it that isn't a vampire. Every stripper, and waitress eventually shows fangs eventually in the film.

There are only two main vamps in the film, only one of which gets any real screen time....

Teresa Politi (Jennifer Travers)
 The fact that Scott was obsessed with loosing her is probably the only thing that made sense in this film as she's extremely hot.  Jennifer somehow became a vampire..How? We don't know as that was never explained but as a vampire it became required for her to work as a stripper I guess.  She got homesick and began to contact Scott through e-mail eventually bringing him to the strip club just to tell him she's alive but not allowed to know (she probably wasn't class valedictorian).  By that point it's too late because of the whole "going to a place he should probably avoid to tell him information he shouldn't know about the people running the establishment" thing.   That's ok though because she makes other way worse decisions throughout the film in attempts to "help" Scott as well including murdering his horny female business partner as a "warning" to her to keep away from him...... some warning.

Tane McClure (Charmagne)
So Charmagne is the owner of the establishment "Night Shade" or at least the leader of the vampire operation going on there. At least I think there is one going on there as we really don't get much of a back story on how any of the stuff is going on is actually going on, it just happens.  We only see her briefly throughout the film despite Jennfers frequent warnings that she is angry and is going to try to kill Scott.  Even with that all of her victims of the film are people who go to her as she never leaves the strip club.  Unfortunately for her she is also one of those "James Bond" type villains who instead of killing their prisoner, has to go on a long rant about how they did what they did and got away with it which eventually leads to her demise.  When will they learn? If you want to see her be a bit more vampiric I recommend the film Re-Vamped

So that's two hot vampires who really don't do too much vampiric stuff, several hot vampires who do but in scenes that are easily miss-able and a story which is down right frustrating. It doesn't have tons of re-watch ability but if you want to see girls with fangs they are there in abundance so this film gets a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5

No comments:

Post a Comment