Saturday, January 20, 2018

Vampiress Review: "Aleta: Vampire Mistress"

The Gist:  Several people and law enforcement agencies argue with each other over jurisdiction regarding a bunch of murders that has resulted in dead bodies missing blood eventually leading them to the lair of an ancient Chinese empress turned vampire. 

Clarification: Basically it boils down to lots of boobs with a barely held together story in between.  A vampire hunter a psychic and an FBI agent go around to crime scenes which usually leads to some sort of flashback scene of vampires doing things.  It looks and feels a lot like a Bollywood film so if you go in knowing that you'll understand what you're getting (terrible acting combined with musical numbers).

Selling Point:  The boobs parts.  Also some of the comedic parts are actually pretty funny (like a vampire hunter telling a potential victim to hurry and go have sex since her captors only want virgins).  Also some of the non comedic parts are also unintentionally funny (Like the scene when a body falls from a car door and you see one of the vampires flinch at the way the actor landed).

Female Vampire Factor:  The lead vampire is Aleta played by Ange Maya.
Her story is that she was turned to a vampire when two underlings in ancient China were messing with a contraption that opened up a dimension.  When it happened some weird computer generated eel things took over her body and she became a vampire.   Her vampire abilities were then used as a weapon for the ancient Chinese government but a curse was placed so she could never go back so she's roamed the Earth since building a harem of vampires.
The Harem does the majority of the vampire stuff in the film which boils down to maybe 3 scenes.

As much as I want to say I downright hated the film I will give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.  Even with all the corniness of it (and there's a lot) on top of the fact that Aleta is hard to understand in some scenes you can't deny it's still a film full of sexy female vampires who's leader likes to rape men.

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