Vampiress Review: Salem's Lot (1979)

 

The Gist: An author named Ben Mears comes back to his home town in order to use it for inspiration to write a horror novel and ends up uncovering a plot by a vampire to take it over. 

Female Vampire Factor:  The first female vampire in the film is a woman by the name of Marjorie Glick (Clarissa Kaye-Mason).  She is the mother of two young kids who are initially targeted by vampire Kurt Barlow and his accomplice Richard Straker.  The boys once turned appear to their friends and family at night and feed on them.  After Marjorie's death she is the first to be witnessed by anyone turning as film protagonist Ben Mears as well as his girlfriends father Dr. Bill Norton are waiting in the coroners office with her body when she raises and is attacked by her, only saved by Ben's tongue depressor created cross. 

 

The last vampiress comes in the form of Ben's love interest in the film Susan Norton (Bonnie Bedelia) 

She's a school teacher in the small town who and as mentioned she ends up getting into a relationship with Ben.  As people in the town begin mysteriously dying and the culprit is figured out to be the residents to a creepy house in town she ends up going to confront them just to get captured.  In the final scene of the film which takes place two years after the events of the film she finds Ben (who destroyed the vampire and his house but couldn't save the town along with a young kid from the town named Mark).  She tells him that they can be together forever before fanging out but is staked by Mark before she could bite Ben. 

Final Opinion:  While this is a decent adaptation it does take awhile to get to the vampire stuff.  As this was originally a mini series watching it in one sitting is over 3 hours and the vampire stuff only takes up the last hour or so with most of the film just revolving around Ben and Susan's relationship.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  The 2004 remake is much more complete from a plot standpoint as well as much more female characters turned. 

Vampiress Review: "Bram Stoker's Van Helsing"

The Gist: After the woman he is in love with falls ill a man seeks the help of a doctor who informs him that the illness is due to her being the victim of a vampire. 

Female Vampire Factor:  The female vampire in this film is Lucy (Charlie Bond)

Final Opinion: Long story short this is the Dracula story but only focused on the portion revolving Lucy's illness, death and resurrection as a vampire with the final portion of the film being when Dr. Van Helsing and Aurther finally slay her. 

It's a pretty interesting concept focusing on what is normally a portion of the story that's considered an afterthought, but it does add some things to it with Lucy's turn lasting longer than one night and her even getting Arthur under her spell and using him to find victims for her.   I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5 just based on the concept being completely focused on the female vampire and not Dracula at all.  It's not a very seductive portrayal like many other versions have Lucy but it's very fang friendly. 

Vampiress Review: Blood Fest

The Gist: A group of horror fans get more than they bargain for when the exhibits at the horror festival they attend end up being real with the guests being the intended victims. 

Female Vampire Factor: In a similar manor as the film Waxwork the films protagonists go from location to location in an enclosed area set aside for a horror festival and each location has a theme loosely based on a real world horror movie (with slight changes to avoid legal action I'm sure). 

In one of the area's the virgin of the group Krill (Jacob Batalon) ends up in a camp ground with a number of attractive women seducing campers. 

In what seems to be an homage to the werewolf scene in the film Trick R Treat the women eventually fang out revealing themselves to being vampires and kill the campers.

One in particular sets her sight on Krill but being that horror movie rules has the virgin always live she let's him go after witnessing how innocent he was.  He leaves being completely oblivious that everyone else there was killed during the conversation or that she was a vampire as he was just happy a hot girl was talking to him. 

Later in the film he looses his virginity to one of the other members of their surviving group.  As they are about to escape the vampire that let Krill go corners the group at the exit.  He (still oblivious to the situation) tells the rest of the group she's cool.   She explains that she feels drawn to him and how innocent he is.  He stupidly admits to her he's no longer a virgin and well.  You can figure out what happens from there. 

The last remaining survivors stake her through the heart and pin her to a truck avenging their fallen friend.

Final Opinion: This was a great comedy/horror flick.  Much more horror than comedy (the humor is scuttle and very dark IE early Nightmare on Elm Street).  The films story has a much deeper commentary on society as a whole and the lengths people with an agenda will go to in order to make a point once the final twist of why all of that is happening is revealed which made it all the better.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.  -1 point for not being a full on vampire film but the parts that were was perfect.  

Vampiress Review: "10 Minutes to Midnight"

 

The Gist: On her last day before a forced retirement a late night radio DJ is bitten by an animal and struggles to maintain her humanity and sanity. 

Female Vampire Factor:  The main character of the film is Amy Marlowe (Caroline Williams)

She shows up for work with a bite mark on her neck that progressively gets worse. After an argument with the young girl who is to replace her she bites the girl in the hand and from there pretty much loses it the rest of the film.  Not being able to understand what's real and what's a hallucination. 

Throughout the movie one of the main subjects of her hallucinations is Sienna (Nicole Kang), the girl pegged to replace her at the radio station. 

Even though she is the one who bit Sienna.  Amy sees her throughout the film as the monster. Including seeing her fang out and feeding on the station manager and her producer. 

Eventually Amy confronts Sienna and drives a wooden stake through her heart taking her out.

By the latter part of the film without Sienna to project as the monster Amy herself begins to show fangs and she eventually feeds on her producer. 

Final Opinion: It's a decent horror movie but moves way too slow for my taste.   Similar to the films Vampire's Kiss and Lilliths Awakening the main driving force of the film is the idea of manipulating the audience into trying to figure out what during the film is actually happening and what is all in her head with the movie never actually clearing up what was what.  The last scene shows the day manager showing up to the studio the next day and finding all the bodies and being attacked by a bat so you never find out whether there actually were vampires or whether she just went psychotic and imagined the whole thing while killing everyone she worked with.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5.  Most fangs scenes are very dark and the last act of the film just kind of throws everything that happened before it away but otherwise pretty decent. 

Vampiress Review: "The Hunger"

The Gist:  A doctor who researches genetic disorders that rapidly ages people ends up the victim of the disorder herself when a one night stand with a vampire leads to illness and rapid aging. 

Female Vampire Factor: The main vampire in the film is Miriam (Catherine Deneuve). 

She is a lonely romantic with the gift of eternal life while also being cursed with the reality that anyone she tries to turn will rapidly age but not die leaving them as an immobile aging husk.  By mid movie you find out that she has a collection of old lovers that she keeps once they've aged beyond the ability to function. 

Her love interest in the film is Dr Sarah Roberts (Susan Sarandon)

Dr. Roberts is a scientific researcher studying genetic disorders that cause rapid aging in children with the hope of extending their lives.  Miriams lover at the time John (David Bowie) who is rapidly aging himself thanks to being turned by her seeks Sarah out with the hope that she can help him. She ends up blowing him off but regrets it when he ages rapidly in just the time he's left in her waiting room. 

She seeks John out after their encounter but is met with Miriam instead as Miriam by that point had already stored John away after his rapid aging.  Miriam takes a liking to Sarah and sleeps with her ending with Sarah being turned and getting very ill. 

 Final Opinion: While I know this film is considered a classic it is one of those artsy type films that moves very slow and replaces plot development with imagery and pretty camera angles while nothing really happens.  The vampires in this film stab people with a sharp object hidden in a necklace to get their blood which is also a downgrade for me.   During it's day my opinion would be very different since this is a very ambitious film for 1983 considering it has nudity and lesbian undertones but otherwise not really that impressed and can't really recommend it.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5. 

Vampiress Review: "Vampire Strippers"

 

The Gist: A group of female vampires seek revenge on the man who turned them. 

Female Vampire Factor:  All the women in the film are eventually turned into vampires.  As the story goes a vampire lures them all in with the promise of making their dreams come true, gives them tainted wine and then they wake up in his basement chained up and in lingerie. 

They eventually break out and go about making money and getting their sustenance via running a strip club. There really isn't much plot outside of the first half hour or so.  From there you just get random stripper scenes

Followed by about 10 minutes of random scenes of them partying and biting men

Followed by a very thrown together ending of the girls getting vampire killing tools and just showing up and killing the vampire Julion that takes all of 2 minutes. 

Final Opinion:  This is a VERY raw film. Poor lighting, poor sound and no real plot to the point that it's just an hour and twenty minutes of stuff just happening with some interruptions of people telling you what the plot is supposed to be.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5.  Basically it's a combination of the films Blood Angels and Vampz but either one of those films would be a better watch for the female vampire stripper or female vampire revenge plots. 

Vampiress Review: "Super Hot"

 

The Gist: A pizza delivery driver seeks the help of her friends to rescue her childhood best friend/crush when she moves in with a sorority of vampires.  

Female Vampire Factor: As mentioned the sorority in the film is a group of female vampires. 

Thing is only two of them actually fang out in the film and they're in quick flashes in one scene so not much actual vampirism happens.

Final Opinion:  This is one of those films that has so much potential but falls short due to a lot of attempted forced comedy that comes off annoying more than funny. 

A good majority of the movie is really annoying conversations between two people acting neurotic in cars.  Take away all of those scenes and the rest of the movie is actually pretty watchable. 

I mean the concept of a lesbian girl trying to save her high school crush from sorority vampires who she believes is trying to kill her works in every way if they knew how to concentrate on that story and not how socially awkward the protagonists of the film are around each other.

If the bulk of the film concentrated more on Jackie (the lesbian protagonist) and her relationship with Carmen (her crush) and how Carmen's personality was changing thanks to the new group she's hanging out with instead of Jackie driving around picking up people and talking about it, this could be an A+ film.  

As is I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  Netflix's "The Babysitter" franchise is what I feel the modern standard is for this type of film (girl protagonist has a crush on ends up being a monster) and this falls short of meeting that standard but it's definitely a respectable try. It does announce a future sequel so we'll see what happens from there. 

Vampiress Review: "Pray for Daylight"

 

The Gist: A vampire hunter who went away to Europe comes back to her home town to find out that a new vampire mistress has taken over the town and isn't happy to have her back.

Female Vampire Factor: The main villain of the film is the vampire Lucretia

She has taken control of all the vampires of the town and keeps a damphyre named Syeria that she has hypnotized to serve her as a bodyguard.

 There's also a vampiress that shows up in flashbacks named Natalia.

 The rest of the vampires are just background characters in the films ending fight scene. 

  This is also the only point where Lucretia shows her fangs which happens after she is shot.

 

Final Opinion:  With a title like "Pray for Daylight" you would think (or hope) for a survival horror film.  What you get instead is a low quality Buffy the Vampire Slayer style drama with pretty much no actual vampirism in the vampire film.  The bulk of the film is slow paced fight scenes, flashbacks in black and white and annoying transitions that have gun shot sound effects.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5.  This film comes across more as an attempt to start a franchise with the Cassie Banning vampire hunter character than anything else.  From what I understand the film makers were self taught and this was a bit of an experimental project for them so by that standpoint it's much better than your average film experiments. The two shorts that proceed this film are much better from a vampirism perspective.

Vampiress Review: "Chinese Speaking Vampires"

The Gist: An actor who has to learn mandarin for a role in a movie ends up taking a night class which is a cover for a Chinese vampire who is turning his students to create an un-dead army. 

Female Vampire Factor: There are two main female characters in the film and both are eventually turned very early in the film.  The first student to be turned in the entire film is Reika (June Lee)

She initially struggles with learning the language and the vampire teacher Master Ya asks her to stay after class.  He then explains to her that he has a way to teach her Manderin instantly before biting her. 

After being turned Reika seeks out her best friend Susie (Daniela Brown).

When she finds her she coerces her back into the school building before cornering her to bite and turn her. 

Suzie is the woman who the main protagonist in the film Tony is obsessed with trying to date.  Once she's turned she uses the opportunity to appear in his bedroom knowing he won't resist inviting her in. 

Obviously due to his obsession with her she has no problem being able to bite him and turn him.

 By mid movie the master has a classroom full of vampires

 

Final Opinion: This film is very corny but is actually pretty entertaining. The overall story is a good vampire vs evil vampire one where the main characters after being turned seem to be the only ones with free will enough to not go with the masters plan to take over Los Angeles and end up fighting against him.  Occasionally they fall back under his control but the paired up couples attraction to each other magically frees them from his control in those situations.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.  After the initial turnings it becomes a full on martial arts film so the vampirism becomes secondary but it's still a functional film none the less.