Vampiress Review: "The Hunger"

The Gist:  A doctor who researches genetic disorders that rapidly ages people ends up the victim of the disorder herself when a one night stand with a vampire leads to illness and rapid aging. 

Female Vampire Factor: The main vampire in the film is Miriam (Catherine Deneuve). 

She is a lonely romantic with the gift of eternal life while also being cursed with the reality that anyone she tries to turn will rapidly age but not die leaving them as an immobile aging husk.  By mid movie you find out that she has a collection of old lovers that she keeps once they've aged beyond the ability to function. 

Her love interest in the film is Dr Sarah Roberts (Susan Sarandon)

Dr. Roberts is a scientific researcher studying genetic disorders that cause rapid aging in children with the hope of extending their lives.  Miriams lover at the time John (David Bowie) who is rapidly aging himself thanks to being turned by her seeks Sarah out with the hope that she can help him. She ends up blowing him off but regrets it when he ages rapidly in just the time he's left in her waiting room. 

She seeks John out after their encounter but is met with Miriam instead as Miriam by that point had already stored John away after his rapid aging.  Miriam takes a liking to Sarah and sleeps with her ending with Sarah being turned and getting very ill. 

 Final Opinion: While I know this film is considered a classic it is one of those artsy type films that moves very slow and replaces plot development with imagery and pretty camera angles while nothing really happens.  The vampires in this film stab people with a sharp object hidden in a necklace to get their blood which is also a downgrade for me.   During it's day my opinion would be very different since this is a very ambitious film for 1983 considering it has nudity and lesbian undertones but otherwise not really that impressed and can't really recommend it.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5. 

Vampiress Review: "Blood of the Virgins"

The Gist: A group of teens spend the night in an old lodge not realizing that it is haunted by vampires. 

Female Vampire Factor: The film begins telling us a story of a woman named Ofelia, sometime in the 19th century.  She is engaged to a guy named Eduardo but secretly seeing a guy named Gustavo.  Gustavo doesn't take too highly to Ofelia's relationship with Eduardo and on their wedding day proceeds to murder him, them reveals he's a vampires and kidnaps Ofelia and turns her. 

Fast forward to the 1960's a bunch of teenagers go and stay at a lodge.  As time goes a girl goes missing.  At the same time one of the guys gets a visit.  It's Ofelia.  Even though she's a vampire she doesn't want to do him any harm and in fact has a thing for him. 

It's without being said that Gustavo is the one going after the girl. A bunch of R- rated sex scenes later Ofelia decides she is tired of living as a vampire.  

 She goes to Gustavo's casket and stabs him in the heart with a knife before turning it on herself. 

 

Final Opinion: I'll get it out the way that this is definitely a Vampire Beauty Rating of 5 out of 5 since Susana Beltran as Ofelia is smoking hot.  The movie itself is average at best but it very much stands out as a Jean Rollins style vampire T&A flick when the vampire stuff finally starts happening which is very much appreciated. All the vamp stuff is done by Gustavo though.  Ofelia's main purpose is to show cleavage and breasts.

Vampiress Review: The Invasion of the Vampires

The Gist:  A vampire count is leading men to their deaths by enticing them with his hypnotized daughter and it is up to an outsider doctor to figure out what's going on and stopping it.

Female Vampire Factor: Only one in the film is the countess.  She's dead most of the film but the way the lore in this film works when the count is killed everyone he has bitten comes back as a vampire so once he's staked in his (very cheesy) bat form.

The vampires he's turned rise from their coffins including the countess.

Final Opinion: So this is the second film in the Count Frankenhousen series from Mexico with the first being 1962's "The Bloody Vampire". Both films center around the vampire count and his loyal human servant Brunhilde using the local village as his own personal blood bank.  Brunhilde wants to be a vampire so her loyalty comes from the promise that the count will turn her one day.

I give the film a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  Pretty much one female vampire scene out of two films (the first film has mostly women being bitten but no turning).  I'd recommend Italy's Cave of the Living Dead from 1964 which pretty much tells the same story as this but with more female vampirism (which isn't saying a lot honestly).

Vampiress Review: "Thirst (1979)"

The Gist: A woman of high society is kidnapped by a brood of blood drinking upper class people who have determined she is the next to join their society due to her lineage relation to Elizabeth Bathory.

Female Vampire Factor: The story revolves around a wealthy aris named Kate Davis (Chantal Contouri).

As mentioned she gets kidnapped and taken to a resort where people are being farmed for their blood so that the rich and high society people running it get to drink it.  It's even delivered to their homes disguised as milk.

The goal is for the society to use brain washing methods to train Kate to accept them and most importantly thirst for blood.  The results in a good portion of the film being really trippy as Kate has horrific visions of pretty much everything becoming bloody.

Eventually they believe that the brainwashing has worked.  She's given her fangs and allowed back into the real world. Unfortunately for the society while she does give into the urge to feed she always immediately regrets it which means they're belief may have been wrong.

One of the members of the society Dr. Frazer decides to go against the group and free both Kate and her boyfriend Derek (who was also been kidnapped).  This ends up being a ruse as the turning was a part of the conditioning programming and the last you see is her giving in to being one of them while being bitten by Dr. Frazer.  As this happens you overhear a conversation where the Dr. is congratulated for successfully converting her.

Final Opinion: This was a GREAT movie.  The entire film revolved around does the beautiful protagonist get turned?  On top of that it's not about supernatural vampires but there was fangs and it was still somewhat supernatural.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.  Had she just become a vampire and turned on her friends and family (which was almost hinted at during the false ending prior to her snapping out of the indoctrination) it probably would have been given a full 5.

Vampiress Review: "Blood Splattered Bride"

The Gist: A young newlywed bride is being haunted by the ghost of a distant relative of her husband who happens to be a vampire.

Female Vampire Factor: Alexandra Bastedo in this film plays Carmilla/Mircalla Karnstein

Mircalla is the long dead relative of the man of the house.  She spends most of the film as a mysterious woman in white stalking young newlywed Susan.  Eventually she finds her way into the home as a woman found buried on the beach going by the name Carmilla that he saves and brings home.

Once she finds her way in the house she spends her time seducing Susan.  She bites Susan putting her under her spell eventually leading to her hating her husband and going on a bit of a killing spree.

Eventually Susans husband starts to finally believe that Carmilla isn't who she says she is (after spending the movie not believing the multiple warnings from Susan and the daughter of their servants Carol). After one day following Susan to find where Carmilla's tomb is he heads back to the tomb where both Carmilla and Susan were both sleeping and he goes on a shooting spree killing both of them.  

 Young twelve year old Carol also appears and after showing that she was also one of Carmilla's slaves, he shoots her as well.  The film ends telling us he is jailed for the murders.

Final Opinion: This movie is super freaky.  A lot of random girl parts and super rough sex sprinkled throughout.  In fact the whole lesbian vampire deal doesn't start until about an hour in as the first hour is pretty much Susan's rough sex habits and fantasy's with her husband.

As far as a vampire film I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  Mircalla is a vampire though but that's treated as more of a matter of fact type of situation.  There are two bite scenes where she drinks from Susan but other than that it's not much of a supernatural vampire film.  She doesn't have fangs and her murdering is with a dagger. It's closer to the film Vampyres than it is any of the other Carmilla Karnstein inspired films.

Vampiress Review: "Terror in the Crypt"

The Gist: An old world count is worried that the spirit of an ancient witch in their bloodline is taking over his daughter.

Female Vampire Factor: I call this a vampire movie without being a vampire movie even though the films other title is indeed "Crypt of the Vampire".  The whole movie makes you believe that Laura Karnstein is unknowingly blacking out and sucking peoples blood.   The only bite scenes in the film are in first person so you never actually see who bites the women.

The bulk of the movie furthers this idea by having Laura act a lot like Carmilla Karnstein (this film could quite easily be a sequel to the Vampire Lovers even though it came out 6 years before it as Hammer also delved into the "Carmillas spirit possessing people" story in their trilogy).  She spends the bulk of the film attaching herself to a woman named Ursula with their relationship coming off many times as more than friendly.

Adriana Ambesi as a vampire is a thing of beauty and she is perfect for the role IF it happened because she is drop dead gorgeous.

 In this case it doesn't happen as the ending swerve ends up being that the girl she's seducing "Ursula" ends up being the spirit of Carmilla and has been manipulating Laura the whole time to make her believe she was the vampire. Eventually Count Karnstein and his crew find Carmilla's crypt just in time and opens it.  All pictures of Carmilla had been destroyed after the original was executed for being a witch so there was no way for them to recognize Ursula as Carmilla prior to opening the crypt and finding her perfectly preserved body.

After opening her crypt they sever Carmilla's heart just as Ursula was trying to take Laura away.  As Carmilla's body is destroyed Ursula shrieks in pain then vanishes into thin air only leaving her dress.

Final Opinion: I LOVED this film.  As Laura more and more starts to believe she's a vampire she begins to kind of act like Carmilla who was a straight up lesbian seductress for those who don't know the story.  If this had fangs even if just one scene it would've been perfect but I easily give this one a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5 none the less. 

Adriana as a vampire isn't lost though.  She does sport fangs in another film I loved "Fangs of the Living Dead" five years later.

Vampiress Review: "Capulina contra los Vampiros"

The Gist: A fool takes the job as a caretaker for an estate overrun by vampires and unknowingly helps to resurrect Dracula.

Female Vampire Factor: Rossy Mendoza plays the mistress of the house.

She uses Capulina to take the spear out of Dracula that was keeping him dead.  Once he does, he is fair game and she along with Dracula proceed to try to feed on him.

Also in the mansion are several other vampire brides who are brought to life once Dracula is resurrected.  They don't get much screen time outside of a few chase scenes though.

Final Opinion: This film is a Spanish language slapstick comedy which is part of a 1970's franchise featuring the character Capulina who's a bumbling fool character.  To say it's corny is a bit of an understatement.  We're talking "Three Stooges" level absurd.  The vampires in the film are dealt with by having their fangs removed and instead of killing them Capulina kind of adopts them and feeds them milk out of baby bottles now that they can't bite people (before waking up realizing the thing may or may not have been a dream).  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5.  The female vampires are great, you just have to sit through a ton of corny slap stick to get to it.

Vampiress Review: "The Vampire and the Ballerina"

The Gist: Members of a ballet troop preparing for a performance seek refuge in a castle inhabited by a vampire countess and her servant.

Clarification: Your stereotypical vampire film of that time with every cliche you can imagine.  Basically a guy and two women get lost and seek refuge at a spooky abandoned castle during a storm just to find it's inhabited by a beautiful countess and her servant.  The servant takes a liking to the women while the countess takes a liking to the guy and it's revealed that both are vampires and the servant controls the countess by allowing her to only feed on him.

Selling Point: A number of sexy dance numbers throughout the film.

Female Vampire Factor:  The countess is played by Maria Luisa Rolando

 Despite being the owner of the castle she goes down as one of the few female vampires in classic films to play the damsel in distress to the unknowing guy and actually mean it and not use it as a way to sucker the guy into a false sense of security.  Even though she is a vampire it is her servant who is the true villain of the film as he is the one who turned her and is responsible for keeping her in the lifestyle which is found out when we find out that she feeds on him in order to stay alive while he feeds on innocent humans

 This results in a lot of personal conflict for the countess as she does evil things but does so in order to stay alive as she is dependent on her servants blood to stay young and beautiful.

The only other female vampire of the film is a peasant girl who is attacked by the servent early on prior to their official introduction in the film.  The town doctor passes her affliction off as just passing out and scratching herself on plants that happen to look like a bite and that she'd be fine in a couple of weeks.  Obviously this wasn't the case and she wakes up at her own funeral.

Later that night she rises from her grave as a full fledged vampire

Unfortunately for her the only woman the countesses servant wants in his life is the countess so he comes and puts a quick end to her via a stake through the heart.

 Not a terrible movie but does give a little bit too much screen time to the ballet dancing portion of the story which slows the plot to a crawl. I give the film a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5. For a similar movie with more T&A check out "The Playgirls and the Vampire"

Vampiress Review: Sampson vs the Vampire Women

The Gist:  A curse makes it so when a young girl turns 21 a group of female vampires will come for her to make her one of them and her father calls on the Luchadore Sampson to protect her from that happening.

Clarification:  Sampson aka El Santo was a very popular Luchadore (pro wrestler) in Mexico so they made a bunch of movies where he basically is a super hero.

Generally the films are the equivalent to pro wrestling versions of a Jackie Chan film, in other words he single handedly beats up hordes and hordes of unnamed henchman using professional wrestling moves in repetitive fight scenes.  Since obviously they won't show a man beating on women the vampire women have weird looking male henchman.

Selling Point:  Vampire Women is in the title so pretty much all you need at this point.

Female Vampire Factor:  Well there are a bunch in the film but the only one to get real screen time would be the head vampire of the group "Tandra" played by Ofelia Montesco

She  is your basic vampire stereotype complete with dark eye makeup, leggy gown with cloak and haunting voice.

Then you have the Vampire Queen Thorina (Lorena Velazquez)

 Basically the two spend the bulk of the film stalking the house the girl who is supposed to join them lives in doing lots of staring.

The film is cheesy with lots of dialogue overly describing the backstory of the plot throughout.  This is both good and bad since it comes off like a 60's/70's style Japanese cartoon in execution but in turn the film gets straight to the action.  One positive is that this was the only vampire film rifted on the 80's/90's show Mystery Science Theater 3000 so if you're looking for further entertainment with it you always have that option.  Unfortunately there isn't much fanging out in the film with the most vampiric thing that happens in it being them turning into rubber looking bats in nearly every scene they appear.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.