Female vampires once ruled the world. Now they are overlooked for glittering guys with big hair. It's time to point out why the female of the species should be the center of attention.
The Freaks are an electronic band out of Europe (specifically London England).
In this video a security guard at a hospital is being chased and eventually attacked by "cheerleaders" who are mysteriously found dead somewhere. The reason I quote the word cheerleaders is the fact that they are dressed like catholic school girls but the newspaper the security guard is reading states they're cheerleaders and there is pom pom's in the morgue with them.
Anyway the three vampire cheerleader school girls spend the video awkwardly dancing toward the security guard while lip sinking Stella Attar's lyrics.
In the end once they get to the security guard they disappear so he thinks it was all a dream. That is until he watches the security camera just to see the whole thing actually did happen.
The Gist: After dying in an accident that stemmed from an argument with a group of jocks that led to a high speed car chase, a group of cheerleaders are brought back to life through black magic but are now linked to each other and must survive off of human blood.
Clarification: A remake of a 2001 movie this film has no clue what it wants to be. Then again maybe it does. If you take the films "The Craft", "Mean Girls" and "Jennifers Body" and put them together this is pretty much what you get. It might have a decent scare factor if it weren't for the fact that the film doesn't actually have a protagonist at all. Basically a group of macho jerks act like jerks to annoying slutty, snobby cheerleaders who then die and become blood sucking, annoying, slutty snobby cheerleaders. Let's be honest here if everyone in this film died for good that school would be a whole lot more tolerable to go to for a lot of people.
The film is divided into 3 sections basically. You've got your beginning which is your run of the mill coming of age teen drama filled with people in cliques walking in slow motion down hallways.
Then you get to the middle which is more or less a supernatural comedy filled with sex and teen girls in Underwear.
And then the films finale which is where the horror portion comes in.
The comedy portion of the film feels extremely out of place as pretty much anything that would be scary ends up having some joke factor involved IE a scene where one of the girls is in the middle of threatening to kill someone but goes down in what you think is terribly acted pain like she's about to vamp out just to find out one of the other girls was having sex which lead to the rest having orgasms where they stood since they're linked to one another. Also two of the girls are sisters whose souls were switched during their reanimation which leads to awkward horror comedy scenes where the younger sister starts living out her older sisters life (including sleeping with her boyfriend) resulting in the older sister going homicidal at people that have no clue they've done anything wrong.
Selling Point: No nudity but tons of National Lampoon level T & A and lesbianism.
Female Vampire Factor: So this film isn't advertized as a vampire film but it is in fact a vampire film and with the exception of the witch who revives them, all the female main characters are vampires (below).
From Left to Right: Amanda Grace Cooper, Brook Butler, Reanin Johannink and Caitlin Stasey
By the way what high school on Earth are the above cheerleader uniforms standard? also for the record the one on the far left is the schools mascot because as we all know, really attractive women are normally what's under those furry costumes.
Anyway here's the disappointing factor for some of you. While they do drink blood, have superhuman strength and are in fact the living dead (there's a scene where Reanin Johanninks character takes her boyfriend (or in this situation her sisters boyfriend as her and her sister switched bodies) virginity and he goes around bragging about it but at the same time being confused because no one told him vagina's were cold), unlike your standard movie vamps they function just fine in the sunlight and they don't have fangs. Ironically enough these girls are more vampiric than most of the movies I review where they do have fangs but never actually use them. Especially the character Tracy played by Brooke Butler (the blonde) who pretty much kills anyone she's alone with.
The rest you never really see feeding outside of a group feeding scene just after they are revived. The one exception being the witch letting the girl she has a thing for feed off of her hand.
Despite that I actually found the film to be very entertaining. (spoiler alert) it does have an open ending so either there will be a sequel or this ends up like "Vampire Academy" and you just have to live with the anti-climatic ending you're dealt. I give the film a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 of out 5. As long as you can get passed the lack of fangs and know what you're getting. It's a pretty decent vampire comedy like film.
In my never ending journey to cover subjects that are rarely talked about but probably should I give you a combination that you would kind of think would get more attention but doesn't. It includes two things that guys tend to like, a seductive woman with fangs and combines it with a girl in a short revealing uniform.
So why doesn't this combination come together more often? The answer is actually pretty simple. They're complete opposites which is extremely hard to bring together. First you have your vampire. Stereotypically they're night creatures who are very cold. The only interaction they want with people is to drain them of their blood. Second you have cheerleaders, they tend to be day people and are very happy and peppy. The first issue being the biggest problem. With the rise of the vampires becoming a stable of teen drama's the two entities are being brought together more often as becoming a creature of the night can't stop a girl from wanting to do all the things that make you popular in school. So while it's a short list here are the examples I could dig up dealing with the subject.
She couldn't get private detective Rafe Guttman to have interest in her the way she was so the fiery redhead supermodel went into fetish mode trying to figure out what kink he was into. Cheerleader was the first and you got an X-rated cheer to go with it.
In this 1999 "B" movie a group of space aliens attempts to take over the Earth via a high school soccer game. The aliens turn the soccer team into vampires who then turn the cheerleaders who then turn the opposing team and so on. Kate was the head cheerleader who was turned by her boyfriend who was the soccer teams captain.
Rebekah, Elena and Caroline aka the Vampire Diaries big 3. Only Rebekah was a vampire first but she was too busy getting killed repeatedly to ever put the uniform on. Caroline and Elena's vamp turn resulted in a short leave of absence from their cheering duties but eventually Caroline got back in the game. Elena is the only one of the group to use the uniform to find potential victims (below).
In the season 1 episode "Three Cheers for Evil" the girls decide to join the cheerleading squad. Erica, to get back at the girls who mocked her when she was a "nerd" and Sarah to make sure Erica doesn't make a meal of the other cheerleaders. Eventually we find out the head cheerleader is an old witch with ego issues who's cast a spell to stay young and popular forever.
In this film 3 Cheerleaders and a mascot are killed after a high speed car crash and brought back to life via a magic spell which required blood for them to stay alive..er..undead.
Sadly, that's pretty much it. There is the VERY rare occasion that actual cheerleaders end up dressing as vampires some examples below.
