Vampire XXX Review: "Twilight Suckers: La Villa dei Desideri Proibiti"

The Gist:  A couple go to a club that is inhabited by vampires.

Clarification:  This is an Italian language hardcore porn.  Their isn't much as far as storyline goes and in a way comes off as a porn version of From Dusk Till Dawn if you took away basically everything that isn't the strip club part and end it without the action scenes.  As far as the vampirism goes, nothing vampirc really happens until the end and the bulk of the film is oral sex.

Selling Point:  If you're into to oral sex scenes you've got plenty of it.

Female Vampire Factor:  Good News is there are three major female characters in the film and they all fang out at some point.  There's two blondes from the club Cristal Jolie

and  Laura De Santis

and finally you have the female of the couple who gets turned after having sex with one of the male vampires played by Scarlet De Lis

The bad news is as said above outside of the very end, it's not very vampiric. I give the film a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5.

Vampiress XXX Review: "One Dark Night: Tale of a Sweet Vampire"

The Gist: A woman lives off of sucking the semen from men.

Clarification: So pretty much just a japanese version of Jess Franco's "Female Vampire"if it was less vampirey but hardcore and the victims don't die.  .

Selling Point: If you're into asian woman and oral sex you'll love this since that's all you get here.

Female Vampire Factor: The star of this film is Marie Konishi

Honestly this is just a straight porn.  No fangs just a tiny japanese woman making slurping noises on pixelated genitalia.  Nothing more, nothing less It gets a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5.

Vampiress XXX Review: "Queen of the Sex Vampire"

The gist: A woman gets a job as a maid and starts to have strange sexual dreams about her employer and being a vampire.

Clarification:  Yeah, I'm not going to insult your intelligence and pretend I even came close to understanding what was going on in this film.   It's not even the language barrier issue as most JAV (That's Japanese Adult Video) movies are pretty self explanatory.  You take one part generic situation and add some inappropriate seducing and you have 90% of these films. Anyway there isn't much if any dialogue in the film at all to even understand to begin with, just awkwardly cut dream sequences that you don't know are dream sequences until she wakes up from them.

Selling Point/Female Vampire Factor: So the JAV Idol in this film is Yaya Matsushima

She spends the film basically in two looks.  The frumpy Japanese Maid outfit that's in most of these films that call for a maid.

And the vampire look which is nothing more than a Dracula style cloak, fangs and stockings.

The movie itself is basically just sex scenes that may or may not be dream sequences with the final one being where she finally becomes full vamp.  It's a so-so JAV vampire film.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5.

UPDATE: After watching the film "Sex Vampire Terror Hospital" which is the first part of this movie the plot makes slightly more sense.  The man that Yaya works for is a vampire who is feeding on her as she's sleeping and the dreams are her becoming a vampire by the end she is the new vampire queen.

Vampiress Review: "Hot Vampire Nights"

The Gist: A Vampiress calls into a late night radio show to share her stories of seducing woman.

Clarification: Not much to this film.  Just your run of the mill scene based lesbian softcore porn.  The radio call in segments act as no more than lead ins to the sex scenes which all consists of a woman doing something sexy by herself then the vampire showing up having sex with her then biting her at the end. The DVD does have a different cover. The odd thing on it is that the cover on the DVD actually features the stars of the film Titanic 2000/Sexy Disaster Movie.

Selling Point: If you like lesbian sex, you get an hour of it.

Female Vampire Factor: Former Playboy cover girl Shelly Jones plays the vampire in this film..

Basically the film is lots of scenes of her posing in sexy lingerie with wind blowing against her when she appears to her victims.  As far as biting goes, no fangs.  Just a very quick bite that signals the end of the scene where they go back to the radio show portion of the film.

This becomes no big deal considering the one time you do get to see fangs in the film which is after Mina (the vampire) turns the radio hostess (Anita Hayes), they are your cheap plastic fangs you get as a gag gifts around Halloween.

As a Vampire film it is totally lacking but pretty good as a Cinemax style softcore film so I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.

Vampiress XXX Review: "Vampire Domination - Taking Everything He Has"

The Gist:  When his nurse quits via text message a doctor hires a new night nurse.  Problem is she ends up being a blood thirsty vampire who wants a little more than a job.

Clarification: This is a film produced by the website primalfetish.com which is a site in which users can create their own personal videos by writing what they want and letting them know what actresses they want in their films.  Unlike their normal videos this particular one is a full feature length adult film complete with ongoing storyline.

Selling Point: It's porn acting so don't expect an academy award winning performance but the scenes and the overall story is hot.  It's a very good vampire film.    You get a lot of fang flashing, hypnosis, biting and lesbianism.

Female Vampire Factor: The main vamp in the film is played by Veruca James.

She spends the entire movie manipulating her co-workers via hypnotizing them.  Her main thing is to play off of their desire for the doctor and she eventually turns both her co nurses played by Aria Alexander

and Kenna Valentina

Once they're all vampires they all get their hands on the doctor in a three way where they screw him and drain him at the same time.  I enjoyed this film very much as it has everything a fang lover could want.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 5 out of 5.

Vampiress XXX Reiview: "Sacred Love: The Feeding"

The Gist: An author suffering through writers blog attempts to write a romance novel about vampires

Clarification:  Basically this is your run of the mill hardcore porn film that attempts to have a plot.  In this case the bulk of the film is black and white badly acted artistic scenes that seem like something out of a 90's perfume add which represents the erotic novel being played out on screen.  The actual sex scenes are in color but anything with dialogue is black and white. The plot of the book itself is about a female vampire who wants to turn her human husband but the way the vampire curse works if he is not willing both will die (or something along those lines, they aren't very clear).

Selling Point: Angelica Sinns massively huge....  Well you see where I'm going.

Female Vampire Factor: Well I already mentioned Angelica Sinns who is the main vampire of the film "Veronica" who is looking to turn her mortal husband.  Veronica also has two nameless Henchwomen played by Gizzel and Nautica Thorn.

Their only scene in the film is a girl on girl not to mention these two are the only females with a bite scene but unfortunately none of the above mentioned females show fangs. In fact out of the four women in this film (all of which play vampires) the only one who does show fangs is Kim Chambers who plays the vampire queen.

The above screencap is the only time you see fangs in this entire film about vampires and in this case she was in her coffin sleep.  As soon as she wakes up they're gone.  As a porn the sex scenes are super hot and have tons of rewatchability.  As a vampire film it's terrible.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5. 

Vampiress XXX Review "Lesbian Vampire Academy"

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