Vampiress Review: Hollyblood

The Gist: A guy with a crush on a girl at his school finds out she has an obsession with finding a real life vampire and pretends to be one in an attempt to get her to fall for him. Unfortunately for him the vampire she is looking for does exist and isn't too happy with his act nor is a bully who also has eyes for the girl. 

Clarification: Nickelodeon came out with a similar flick called "Liar, Liar, Vampire" in 2015 with the same story of a guy pretending to be a vampire in an effort to impress a girl at his school who is obsessed with them.  This is a bit of an upgrade from that considering the twist of vampires actually being real with the last twenty minutes of the film being a supernatural action/horror film. 

Female Vampire Factor: In the major twist ending of the film we find out that the vampire that started the whole thing by turning the student who is actually one is their teacher, a catholic school nun. 

While she's not much to look at initially, once the odds are against her with the group of kids started to get the one up on her she transforms herself into basically a Selma Hayak in From Dusk Till Dawn type stripper which does briefly distract all the horny high school kids.  

In another twist all the female characters in the film briefly turn.   

When the group of kids realize that they are outmatched by the vampire nun they devise a plan in which they ingest the blood of who they thought was the bad vampire, a kid named Azreal which turns all (but the vampire hunter kid who turns it down) into vampires.  This condition reverses when they kill the nun which turns Azreal back to normal as well as anyone he turned. 

Final Thoughts: This is one of those films that would be really good if it would have just gotten to the point but instead it just drags on and on till it's pretty much unwatchable then gets good in the last 15-20 minutes. The parts that are good (the comedic parts) are very good such as their parody of Twilight and the overall theme at the end that nearly everyone in the film was lying to the main girl to get next to her including her best friend who you find out during the ending vampire fight was a lesbian who was faking a physical disability because it made the girl talk to her the whole time.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  It tried to redeem itself at the end but it was way too late at that point.

The Vampiress Episode: "Women: Stories of Passion"

"The Little Vampire"

Season 2

Episode 7

Women: Stories of Passion was a weekly erotic television series produced by Playboy entertainment which aired on the Showtime Network from 1996 to 1999.  The premise of the show was an author interviewing women about their romantic escapades with men basically just making it a live action romance novel. Every week it would be a different woman with a different story to tell where she has lots of passionate sex. 

In this episode from the shows second season which aired in 1997 we meet a woman named Angelica (Shannah Laumeister)

Once upon a time she got with some guy while she was drunk who loured her outside and bit her turning her into a vampire.  She then spent the bulk of her life in an abandoned mansion by herself eating mice.  

One day she lours a guy into the mansion where they eventually have sex.  She bites him but doesn't drain him. They fall for each other so this happens repeatedly.  

As they start to get close the vampire who turned her returns to take her back and threatens her new beau.  He wants her to stop eating mice and learn to kill humans including her new man. 

This results in her learning to stand up for herself and eventually sacrificing herself for her new man which apparently broke the vampire curse and they live happily ever after.  

You're not going to get much out of this episode other than R rated sex scenes and there are no fangs.  If you're into fairy tales this series is a good watch.  Otherwise not the top of the line in the softcore porn genre. 

Vampiress Review: "Vampire In Love"

The Gist:  A young vampire girl struggles with her feelings for the human boy she grew up with.

Clarification: Yes it's a vampire romance BUT it's actually a very entertaining one mainly because the vampires in it are actually vampires (not moody teenagers).  They have fangs, they feed and they have vampire related problems which this film centers around including but not limited to the fact that they recommend to the young girl that the Dracula method is the best way to take a human lover (IE stalk him, turn him and he has no choice but to stay with you).

Kiiara (the main vampire in the film)  also has the problem of being the object of the affection of an evil vampire that wants her for himself.  This brings some action elements to the film specifically the last half hour or so.

Selling Point: Good enough mix of romance, comedy and action that the film doesn't get boring.

Female Vampire Factor:  The main protagonist of the film Kiira is played by Mirei Kiritana.

With the exception of the blood lust, vampires in this universe can live generally like humans since they can exist in daytime.  They do have to avoid silver, garlic and must be invited in to enter homes but they also have the ability to erase peoples memories and teleport.   Because of this the struggle Kiira has in the film is strictly because she cares enough to no want to force the life on him.

Basically you get a lot of her holding her vampire side back as best as she can throughout the films beginning.

 The film is pretty much reverse Japanese Twilight with a personality and not drawn out over several movies.  If you're not into sappy films stay clear but it's not bad at all.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5.  She fangs out a few times throughout the movie just not enough to give it a score higher than that but still enjoyable.