Female vampires once ruled the world. Now they are overlooked for glittering guys with big hair. It's time to point out why the female of the species should be the center of attention.
The Gist: A bumbling old man is invited by a brood of vampires to become one of them.
Clarification: The premise of the short film is that an old kind of senile man named Frank falls asleep and the vampire portion is an Alice in Wonderland type dream. Everything the vampires say to try to bring him into the group goes over his head as he's preoccupied with wanting chips.
Selling Point: After how many decades we finally got Hammer Horror super babe Caroline Munro as a vampire.
She was 68 at the time of the filming but I couldn't care less. She still looks great and I've been waiting for that since Dracula A.D. 1972
Female Vampire Factor: The brood consists of 3 vampiresses (along with a male doctor)
In a "Wizard of Oz" type spin the middle vampire in the picture is also Franks nurse as it seems he lives in a nursing home or assistant living facility in the beginning. This leads to a the cliched "it was just a dream or was it" ending where she wakes him up but the last shot of the scene is her flashing her fangs.
The film was pretty funny so I have no real complaints and Munro was just the icing on the cake. I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 5 out of 5.
The Gist: A Vampire Hunter is sent to solve the deaths of women in a town from rapid aging.
Clarification: This is best described as if Countess Dracula was a swashbuckling action movie. Only difference being that these are actual traditional vampires (the supernatural fanged kind) though the results are the same (blood drinking to preserve youth instead of nourishment). The more they drink the younger they get. It is even stated during the film that the family that the murders revolve around are distantly related to the Karnsteins of Hammers other series of films.
Selling Point: Kronus' assistant is played by the super sexy bond girl Caroline Munro
Female Vampire Factor: This film falls under more of a "who done it" than your traditional Hammer vampire film we're used to where you know from the beginning who the vampire is but no one else in the film does so in this case you don't actually see your vampires till the very end. There is some bait and switch to keep you guessing but in the end (SPOILER ALERT!) it turns out that the old bed ridden widow of Captain Kronus' friend Lord Durward "Lady Durward" (Wanda Ventham) is in fact the vampire.
The reveal is done in a way that you never actually see her as a vampire (they only show the fangs but not who they belong to).
While the movie itself is entertaining this is just another Hammer Horror film in which I spent the whole thing hoping Caroline Munro would get turned and was completely let down (the other being Dracula A.D. 1972). While a female being reveled as the vampire did act as a payoff having that T&A dangled in front of you the whole film for nothing to really happen with her is a disappointment. I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5.
The Gist: Countess Elizabeth Nadasdy after discovering that bathing in the blood of virgins reverses her aging masquerades as her own daughter in order to seduce a younger man into marrying her.
Clarification: Basically the Elizabeth Bathory story but Hammer Horror version (IE with nudity and angry villagers). Not much else to add that is not mentioned in the gist. The Countesses biggest issue which leads to her downfall is her own greed as she sacrifices her loyal lover and her own daughter for the chance to live this younger life. That and the fact that her youth only comes back temporarily and every time it wears off she seems to age even older.
Selling Point: Another excuse to see the late Ingrid Pitt naked.
Female Vampire Factor: Much to the surprise of some there are no female vampires in this film in the supernatural sense. The countess is a regular mortal woman who has supernatural side effects when she partakes of and baths in the blood of virgins. She is a very wrinkly old woman normally
but after her blood treatment she becomes Ingrid Pitt hotness (below).
